User blog:Avatar XIII/DCRB 14: Zack Snyder vs Michael Bay
Hey guys. This one was a bit of a strange one. This was what I was working on when the sequel to Trump vs Luthor suddenly came to me. But now I'm back on track with what I actually have planned, so yay. Just gonna be real with y'all, I didn't give two shits about the title cards and stuff. It is such a pain in the ass trying to find png backgrounds for real people. I admire anyone who has the patience to sit through doing that. I am clearly not one of them. I mean by god, that probably would've taken longer than the writing itself. Blerrgh. Anyway, enough complaining from me. This match up pits the director of the DC Extended Universe, Zack Snyder, against the bonafide badass of the preteen movie industry, Michael Bay. Lights, camera, action. Beat Battle VS GO! (Battle begins at 0:21) 'Zack Snyder:' The film just started and my eyes are already rolling There’s nothing but cheesy action, hot chicks and explosions No character, no plot, no meaning, no emotion You can’t handle the spotlight, but I was born for this moment! Negative criticism doesn’t bother you? Alright, if you say so It takes a lot to ignore the stench of those rotten tomatoes Sit down and let me show you how to make a real classic I’ll school you like your guide to sexual harassment 'Michael Bay:' I make movies for teenage boys. Oh dear, what a crime Come talk to me after I’m done with Transformers Five Started off as a Bad Boy and Rocked my film debut Your lousy originals got Sucker Punched by bad reviews! I satisfy the audience with the visuals, I’m amazing! You suck the color out of heroes. No wonder the fans keep complaining! Man did they choose a dud as the director of the DCEU How the hell do you make the big two worse than The Room? 'Zack Snyder:' Oh please, I’m the very thing the DCEU needs I brought to life the best Superman since Christopher Reeve Even dawned a new era of the dead before AMC But at least you made a shitty account of the kamikaze (Oooh) I got Gals celebrating the 75th anniversary All you have is an ugly Fox obsessed with plastic surgery Shouldn’t have insulted Batfleck, cause now you can’t murder me (Ha!) So Watch out cause this isn’t the last you Heard of me Now I’ll slow this down. I know this speed is too much Four you I’d share the wisdom of the Owls but good filming would bore you So run along Bayby. You’ve given cinema enough strife Go Purge yourself from the film biz and vanish like the Last Knight 'Michael Bay:' You finished? I thought you’d go on until Tomorrow It must be hard to change up your style, believe me, I know Cause that fruity suicidal movie was straight up asinine Who the fuck steals screentime from the Clown Prince of Crime? You do too many comic films man. That shit gets old Shove some Soul into your work and make some Black Gold You had your time to shine. Now it’s the Rise of my Empire Still think you’re better? Then let me give you a reminder I’m rich bitch! (Yeah!) I don’t need permission to be reckless! I stack towers over Lex Luthor, and I know he’s jealous! With all this mother fucking money! I’m the best thing you can get! You’ll be stuck with your 8 kids while I’m having dinner on my jet! (Boom!) Who Won? ---- Hints Category:Blog posts